The craziest shoots ever?

[Mike Nomic]

'Candy came from out on the Island' - well, no, the Midlands actually.

CC had long had a mind to do a mud shoot, and was recommended to me by DD. CC made contact a few days ago, and as we were both free over Easter decided that this was an opportunity to be used, despite the potentially less than ideal conditions. I did warn her, but no she was adamant she wanted to do it.
She arrived on Saturday, and after chatting and trying outfits, we had a look at some of my recent work including stills of Steph on the bank of the Severn. That was enough to get CC going, and she wanted to do a shoot there and then - about 6.00pm on the Severn in the face of a rapidly rising tide and a howling wind! She 'only wanted to stick her toes/feet in to see what it felt like' so we went for it, with my mutterings about getting carried away ringing in her ears. About an hour later, with high tide imminent, I'm freezing my bits off trying to hold a camera still, while CC is in a state of considerable undress and sunk to her upper calves in thick, clinging Severn mud - happy but cold: too cold in fact to wash off etc, but promising not to get mud in my new car.
Sunday, and it's the main event. Off to the Swindon area, and it's sleeting on the way there. I discover after about ten miles that I've forgotten my fags (but CC came to the rescue with one of her roll-ups), and when we get there that I've forgotten the tripod for the video camera. Hoping to do two 1 hour shoots, CC duly goes in to the mud/quicksand in a skimpy red vinyl top, a red vinyl microskirt, fencenet tights and red thighboots. The temperature is about 5C, and the wind chill factor doesn't bear thinking about. I've done my usual trick of forgetting to switch on the external microphone for the first few minutes of shooting, I'm struggling manfully against insurmountable odds to hold the video camera steady in the teeth of a gale with rapidly numbing hands, and CC ... she's having a blast! After about forty minutes (which she said felt like only twenty) the attractiveness of this idea is beginning to pale, and we wrap it up and decide to forego the second shoot, which was to have been in a catsuit and boots, with CC going for total immersion!
Again too cold to clean up, I pull the boots off (to hell with the zips, neither of us could manage them) and CC puts her ordinary clothes back on over the top of the little she was wearing, sticks her feet in her trainers, and we head for home, stopping on the way for large hot chocolate drinks.
Once home, unpacked, showered and warmed up, CC checks the internet and guess what ... uncontrollable shivering, numb feet and hands, poor coordination (couldn't roll a fag to save our lives), poor brain function (CC sent a short text message which I understand is all bar unintelligible) - yes, the symptoms of medium to severe hypothermia!
Would we do it again? NO!! Not at this time of year - the buzz phrases from yesterday are 'Later in the year' and 'When the weather gets warmer' when we will be repeating the exercise; we're both looking forward to it very much.
As I type this, the car has been brushed and sponged inside; it just awaits hoovering out the residual mud, the boots, outfit, etc are coming to the end of the wash cycle, I've emptied a kilo of mud (enough for some people [no names, no pack drill] no doubt to do do a full on mud shoot) out of the bath, removed all the bath panels and cleaned the trap, and I shall shortly hoover up the trail of small mud fragments from the front door to the bathroom. Whoever (I think it might have been me)suggested that there's far less to clean up after an outdoor mud shoot as against an indoor food/gunge shoot was a liar and a fool!
Thanks to CC for being an star and an absolute trouper. Roll on the summer!!

Mike. Likely to be known henceforth as Mike Nomic Nofags Notripod Nof*ckingsense.

[andy250]

Hello mate,

Cant believe you forgot you cigs!!! he he he. and yet again forgot to turn the sound on!!!!!! what are you like. The weather is a bit all over the place at the mo, myself and Jammed nipped down to Astley lake the other week. It was blowing a gale then and we where just checking it over for summer.

regards

Andy

[Candy Custard]

I am laughing to much o compose a sensible reply back later omg pmsl

[Candy Custard]

ok attempting a sesible reply now but still giggling

my darling mike no mic no tripod no fags no effing sense even with hypothermia and having never been so cold in all my life (even the time i got sploshed with water than camped without drying out in a freezing field)and shivering SO much im sure it registered on the richter scale......... it was a scream, so much fun and oooooohhhhhh my god that mud is amazing. Cant wait to get back in A BIT LATER IN THE YEAR maybe just maybe WHEN THE WEATHER IS WARMER

dids is still insiting I receive some sort of wam medal, I say it was plenty reward enough just to have had the experience

thanks so much for having me and see you soon xxxxxxxx(but not TOO soon)

[Miss T]

.....
dids is still insiting I receive some sort of wam medal, I say it was plenty reward enough just to have had the experience

Not bloody surprised he is..... wam medal deserved. I think this does certainly rank as one of the craziest wam shoots ever..... unless you know differently of course

[BillShipton]

I think you are both mad.

I only walked along the seafront to Bexhill to visit my Mum (it was her 83rd birthday) and nearly froze doing that.

Bet it took a LOT of double vodka and cokes to warm Candy up again!

PS Nice though irrelevant story. My parents went to church as usual on Easter Day and were chatting to the church treasurer. During the course of the conversation (about comedy and religion) the treasurer said,

"Well actually I have some involvement in it. You know Harry Hill? He's my son."

To which my Mum replied (without thinking).

"Oh, I am sorry."

Now what are the chances of that happening, eh?

[Mike Nomic]

I think you are both mad.

Bet it took a LOT of double vodka and cokes to warm Candy up again!

No, they're reserved for other occasions. Candy has a prodigious appetite and capacity for red wine, and we then planned to make inroads into my collection of single malts. But we recalled the old adage 'Never mix grape and grain', and discretion being the better part of oh my f*cking head we just sampled one.

There will I'm sure be opportunity to enjoy more when we do further shoots 'later in the year' 'when the weather gets warmer'.

Mike.

[Sploshman]

Candy told me about the shoot when i was down at hers on Monday.

All i got to say is - YOU BLOODY NUTTERS LOL

[DecadentDoll]

"Well actually I have some involvement in it. You know Harry Hill? He's my son."

To which my Mum replied (without thinking).

"Oh, I am sorry."

*has just laughed her pants off, oh my god.....classic line from your mum there!*

[captain sensible]

"... You know Harry Hill? He's my son."

To which my Mum replied (without thinking).

"Oh, I am sorry."

But which mum is better? Bill Shipton's mum, or Harry Hill's mum? There's only one way to settle this...

FIGHT!!!

[Hayley]

"... You know Harry Hill? He's my son."

To which my Mum replied (without thinking).

"Oh, I am sorry."

But which mum is better? Bill Shipton's mum, or Harry Hill's mum? There's only one way to settle this...

FIGHT!!!

Having met Bill's Mum a few times, I would think twice. Feisty woman!