Thank you, DD. Yes, I do have a Welsh accent, but it's quite a well spoken one. Not common, like.
I love your accent, too. Gorgeous. I especially loved that part in your "treacle" film in the Free House when you poured the treacle over your head and squeaked. That really did it for me.
Yes indeed! Thank God for adultery! Not that I have to resort to it myself being single. But as for those twins, they were both cheating on someone when they were with me those times.
Confessional
by welshcakes » 29 May 2006, 12:23
Look, if you're all going to throw pies around would you mind throwing them at me!!!
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by DecadentDoll » 30 May 2006, 20:15
takes two to tango i suppose, and thank you, my accent is weird and irish like... nice to see some people like it 
Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. Dr Seuss
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by KingArthur » 31 May 2006, 11:30
Forgive me, Sister Hayley, for I have sinned. As the Royal Confessor, you - and perhaps Sister Clare - are the only one who can grant me absolution.
Here are my two confessions: one minor, the second major naughtiness.
Firstly - I worked in the US for a couple of years until recently. When I was there, I developed a taste for wamming unsuspecting people. Not lobbing custard pies at innocent passers by, more inviting girls back to mine for a coffee, then letting the messy fun begin. My approach was always to let the poor unsuspecting honeys to think it was as much their idea as it was mine, which let me get away with all sorts. Not wanting to brag (after all, I AM in the confessional), there were at least two occasions that spring to mind where the girls in question were complete WAM virgins, had no previous experience - or knew what was waiting for them back at my apartment - yet were (at their own behest) semi (and in one case completely) naked and covered in pies, custard and a whole manner of gunge before the evening was through. My sin is not the wamming (which was entirely mutually consenting), but the wicked and evil way in which I lured innocent girls back to my den of iniquity.
Secondly (and this is current) - I am involved in a local scheme where young professionals mentor teenage kids (don't worry - everything is legal here!) and guide them through GCSE's and A-level choices with a career in mind. I am mentoring a young lad whose mum is in the process of divorcing his dad. She is hotter than a hot thing. Her name is Sue, she is in her late 30's (she married young, I am told!) slim with cascading ringlets of raven black hair and a well toned body (many hours spent in the gym). Anyway, I am not in the mood for a relationship at the moment (and would not go down well with the mentoring programme - or the lad I am mentoring), but she has made numerous passes at me over the last six weeks or so. Anyway, I was at their house one evening last week and - coffees in hand - her son phoned to say he was going to stay at a mates to revise and to apologise to me for messing me around. Gallantly, I said exams come first so no apology necessary, and intended to leave after my coffee. Sue made another pass at me, suggesting that perhaps there was "something else" we could do, to make sure this was not a wasted journey. She asked me what I liked to do to "spice things up" in the bedroom. (Remember, this was a lonely, bored, yet very attractive, housewife. Husband gone, kid away, alone with yours truly in the house.) I said I would be happy to show her...actions speaking louder than words, and all that. I suggested she got changed into something "more comfortable" and met me in the kitchen, while I prepared stuff down here. She disappeared and I surveyed the fridge and freezer. Luckily, she had entertained the night before so there were a few half eaten gateux, and a couple of trifles in the fridge. She had some very thick Greek yoghurt and I took two tubs of ice cream out of the freezer and popped them in the microwave (HINT - if you do this, stir it thoroughly otherwise you can burn yourself!). She reappeared in a really nice dress which showed off her cleavage, and flashed me a crafty look of the top of her suspenders, belted to some very sexy knickers. I'm not sure what she was expecting...sex on the counter top or something. Anyway, I asked her to sit at the breakfast bar. I opened the greek yoghurt and said "my fetish is food-play. I like to have food fights with beautiful women, which start clothed and get more and more naked from there. Sex rarely happens at the end, but it is fun. Do you want to try it?" She looked a little puzzled, then said "OK, why not? Sounds like it could be fun". I immediately poured the greek yoghurt down the front of her dress, and pushed a half eaten gateau into her face. Without boring you with the details, within about thrity minutes, both Sue and I were wrestling on the floor, stark naked and covered in whatever we could grab from the fridge and her food cupboards. Breathless, we concluded by showering together. I left half promising that maybe we'd do it again sometime. Perhaps we will. My confession, Sisters Hayley and Clare, is not for the session, but for the callous use of the mentoring programme to participate in a WAM session with the mother of the lad I am meant to be influencing for the good.
What should be my penance?
King Arthur
Here are my two confessions: one minor, the second major naughtiness.
Firstly - I worked in the US for a couple of years until recently. When I was there, I developed a taste for wamming unsuspecting people. Not lobbing custard pies at innocent passers by, more inviting girls back to mine for a coffee, then letting the messy fun begin. My approach was always to let the poor unsuspecting honeys to think it was as much their idea as it was mine, which let me get away with all sorts. Not wanting to brag (after all, I AM in the confessional), there were at least two occasions that spring to mind where the girls in question were complete WAM virgins, had no previous experience - or knew what was waiting for them back at my apartment - yet were (at their own behest) semi (and in one case completely) naked and covered in pies, custard and a whole manner of gunge before the evening was through. My sin is not the wamming (which was entirely mutually consenting), but the wicked and evil way in which I lured innocent girls back to my den of iniquity.
Secondly (and this is current) - I am involved in a local scheme where young professionals mentor teenage kids (don't worry - everything is legal here!) and guide them through GCSE's and A-level choices with a career in mind. I am mentoring a young lad whose mum is in the process of divorcing his dad. She is hotter than a hot thing. Her name is Sue, she is in her late 30's (she married young, I am told!) slim with cascading ringlets of raven black hair and a well toned body (many hours spent in the gym). Anyway, I am not in the mood for a relationship at the moment (and would not go down well with the mentoring programme - or the lad I am mentoring), but she has made numerous passes at me over the last six weeks or so. Anyway, I was at their house one evening last week and - coffees in hand - her son phoned to say he was going to stay at a mates to revise and to apologise to me for messing me around. Gallantly, I said exams come first so no apology necessary, and intended to leave after my coffee. Sue made another pass at me, suggesting that perhaps there was "something else" we could do, to make sure this was not a wasted journey. She asked me what I liked to do to "spice things up" in the bedroom. (Remember, this was a lonely, bored, yet very attractive, housewife. Husband gone, kid away, alone with yours truly in the house.) I said I would be happy to show her...actions speaking louder than words, and all that. I suggested she got changed into something "more comfortable" and met me in the kitchen, while I prepared stuff down here. She disappeared and I surveyed the fridge and freezer. Luckily, she had entertained the night before so there were a few half eaten gateux, and a couple of trifles in the fridge. She had some very thick Greek yoghurt and I took two tubs of ice cream out of the freezer and popped them in the microwave (HINT - if you do this, stir it thoroughly otherwise you can burn yourself!). She reappeared in a really nice dress which showed off her cleavage, and flashed me a crafty look of the top of her suspenders, belted to some very sexy knickers. I'm not sure what she was expecting...sex on the counter top or something. Anyway, I asked her to sit at the breakfast bar. I opened the greek yoghurt and said "my fetish is food-play. I like to have food fights with beautiful women, which start clothed and get more and more naked from there. Sex rarely happens at the end, but it is fun. Do you want to try it?" She looked a little puzzled, then said "OK, why not? Sounds like it could be fun". I immediately poured the greek yoghurt down the front of her dress, and pushed a half eaten gateau into her face. Without boring you with the details, within about thrity minutes, both Sue and I were wrestling on the floor, stark naked and covered in whatever we could grab from the fridge and her food cupboards. Breathless, we concluded by showering together. I left half promising that maybe we'd do it again sometime. Perhaps we will. My confession, Sisters Hayley and Clare, is not for the session, but for the callous use of the mentoring programme to participate in a WAM session with the mother of the lad I am meant to be influencing for the good.
What should be my penance?
King Arthur
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by Hayley » 31 May 2006, 11:48
Misuse of the mentoring service is indeed a sin. Sploshing the mums of kids in need of moral/academic guidance has an irony but not one you should be proud of.
Stand in the corner in this schoolgirl outfit and recite your 9 times table and let me mentor you with my cane!
And God bless you...
Hayley
Stand in the corner in this schoolgirl outfit and recite your 9 times table and let me mentor you with my cane!
And God bless you...
Hayley
by KingArthur » 31 May 2006, 12:05
Hayley - I'm glad you also spotted the irony - shouldn't I be proud of it? OK perhaps not. Anyway, here I am in the corner...1x9=9, 2x9=18, 3x9=27...
What are you and GungeSlut going to do to further punish me???
King Arthur
What are you and GungeSlut going to do to further punish me???
King Arthur
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by KingArthur » 31 May 2006, 12:24
Fair enough...one mustn't argue with the teacher... I notice your back is turned, although you are looking very sexy in a victorian school teacher's uniform. You have a very tight tweed skirt and a white "sensible" blouse, buttoned up to the neck. You are also wearing a teachers gown and a mortar board, with some very serious black glasses.
I realise that your back is turned because you are checking you have everything you need for the next lesson...cookery. The eggs, milk, flour and butter are all there, as is the cream and icing sugar and jam. I notice from the blackboard that today's lesson will be a cream spongecake, two of which you have prepared, as an example to the class.
"3x9=27, 4x9=36" I continue, creeping towards you without you noticing. I pick up both cream spongecakes, both glistening with their creamy toppings. Before you realise what is happening, I push one into your face. You double forward in shock. I carefully lift up your skirt and bury the second pie into your bum, squishing the cream all over both cheeks.
How do you react???
I realise that your back is turned because you are checking you have everything you need for the next lesson...cookery. The eggs, milk, flour and butter are all there, as is the cream and icing sugar and jam. I notice from the blackboard that today's lesson will be a cream spongecake, two of which you have prepared, as an example to the class.
"3x9=27, 4x9=36" I continue, creeping towards you without you noticing. I pick up both cream spongecakes, both glistening with their creamy toppings. Before you realise what is happening, I push one into your face. You double forward in shock. I carefully lift up your skirt and bury the second pie into your bum, squishing the cream all over both cheeks.
How do you react???
- KingArthur
- Posts: 45 [ View ]
- Joined: 27 Apr 2006, 15:08
by Messypockets » 31 May 2006, 14:31
All the confessions in here have been great! Glad I started this. Thought it might have been a bit of a none starter. Only trouble is I have nothing to confess as wild as some so I'm never going to get punished by Hayley or GS. Ho hum. Wait a minute I have a cunning plan. I'll have to do some bad stuff. But wait the idea of this confessional was not to encourage sin, it was to punish it! Damn, foiled by my own post! But without the sin there would be no punishment which would mean Hayley can't have her fun! Thats wrong, thats very wrong! Can anyone help me with my dilemma? or should I just stop moaning and go away and think long and hard about my foolishness?
- Messypockets
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- Location: Buckinghamshire
by KingArthur » 31 May 2006, 14:40
Hey MessyPockets,
The trouble with this is that the punishment should be a deterrent - a bit like the prison system. No wonder the crime rate is so high, if people don't give a monkeys about doing a bit of bird (believe me, I know!!! I've represented a few of them professionally!). Equally, if the punishment attached to a naughty confession is a going over by GungeSlut or Hayley, you can hardly expect it to deter people from sinning, can you?
Therefore, by Royal Decree, I hereby proclaim an amnesty on all confessions throughout the land. The better the confession, the better the punishment. The more crap (e.g. I once dropped a 10p on the floor and looked up my sister's best mate's skirt...yawn!) then the more crap the punishment. You can even REQUEST your punishment, if you like!
GUNGESLUT -- Would you consent to being appointed Royal Executioner...you get to dole out all the punishments!!!
You may begin.
"King" Arthur
The trouble with this is that the punishment should be a deterrent - a bit like the prison system. No wonder the crime rate is so high, if people don't give a monkeys about doing a bit of bird (believe me, I know!!! I've represented a few of them professionally!). Equally, if the punishment attached to a naughty confession is a going over by GungeSlut or Hayley, you can hardly expect it to deter people from sinning, can you?
Therefore, by Royal Decree, I hereby proclaim an amnesty on all confessions throughout the land. The better the confession, the better the punishment. The more crap (e.g. I once dropped a 10p on the floor and looked up my sister's best mate's skirt...yawn!) then the more crap the punishment. You can even REQUEST your punishment, if you like!
GUNGESLUT -- Would you consent to being appointed Royal Executioner...you get to dole out all the punishments!!!
You may begin.
"King" Arthur
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by Messypockets » 31 May 2006, 16:01
Anonymous wrote:Brilliant!!!!!!
Whoops.Did that thing DD and Hayley did. Forgot to sign in.Doh!!!!
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by DecadentDoll » 31 May 2006, 18:23
Sorry to be a party pooper... but you dont get proper punishments in confession, you have to do something to atone for your sins... like a penance.
I suggest a detention thread for all of gunge sluts naughty boys in need of punishing.
I suggest a detention thread for all of gunge sluts naughty boys in need of punishing.
Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. Dr Seuss
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