The kitchen gets dirty

[topcattopone]

Having been a lurker for longer than I care to remember, ( I started buying "Splosh Magazine from issue two) I thought I better contribute something to the forum. I am unable to provide pictures so perhaps some of my writings will suffice. This is an extract from one of my stories. To set the scene, the story is being told by Paula Bradshaw, her husband is Dave and Trudy is her best friend, also a WAM enthusiast.

We wasted no further time in getting back home and having sex on the hall floor, Dave kicking the door shut with his foot as he fell on top of me. It was not one of our longest love making sessions, but we lay there with Dave shafting me quickly. Suddenly the door opened and Trudy walked in. “Can anyone join in?” she asked and pretended to take off her dress. “You two!” she said exasperated, “You don’t even shut the front door properly before you shag in the hallway!” “If we’d have known you were coming, we wouldn’t have started without you!” Dave quipped.

We retired to the kitchen for coffee, I having taken off the remains of my dress in order to salvage something from it. Dave had opened a tin of Pilchards for lunch. We told Trudy about Petra/Jan/Zophia and how the first two wanted us to get the third into exhibitionism. “I can think of no-one better qualified to do it.” She said.

As we sat at the kitchen table, Trudy reached over and accidentally knocked over the carton of milk that had been standing there. I quickly stood it up again but not before some of the milk ran off my side of the table and onto my leg. “Clumsy bugger!” I called her and threw the rest of my coffee at her. It hit her neck and ran down her chest onto her flowered print dress.

“Right!” She exclaimed “This is war!”

She grabbed the opened tin of pilchards and tipped the lot, oil, fish bones, skin and scales on to the top of my head! She then mashed it all together into a sort of mulch and rubbed it well into my hair. I suppose I had it coming after throwing coffee at her but was so amazed that I sat there for a moment to gather my thoughts. Trudy stood back, her fishy hands on the hips of her coffee stained dress, She cocked her head to one side and demanded “Well? Are you going to make a fight of it, or are you too much of a wimp? That was enough for me, I looked round for some ammunition with which to retaliate. Wimp indeed!
Opening the fridge, I pulled out a tub of margarine and scooped out a handful, I wiped it across her face and down over the bodice of her dress. Dave handed her an open tin of golden syrup, which she took and poured over my head, rubbing it in with the fish and oil as she did so. Dave seemed to be acting as second to both of us as then he gave me a packet of instant custard. There was only one place for that – over her red hair. I smeared some of the margarine which was on her face up to mix with the custard and rubbed the mixture well in. In the meantime Dave was busily opening tins, packets and bottles, putting them within reach of both of us. He was clearly relishing his role of assistant. I wrestled Trudy to the kitchen floor and sat astride her hips, and bombarded her face and torso, with all manner of things, including creamed rice pudding, horseradish sauce, beans, spaghetti in tomato sauce, in fact anything messy I could reach from Dave’s arsenal. I became aware that Dave was now tipping stuff over my back and bare arse, but I was so intent on making a real mess of Trudy that I took no notice. Trudy was giggling all the time, clearly enjoying the fight, as was I. She reached up and pulled my face down to hers and gave me a kiss, just a matey type of kiss but that was followed by another, then another of a more intensive kind and soon the mixtures of syrup, custard and margarine covering our faces and heads were being transferred, from one to the other.

Dave then sat astride my naked back, forcing my body down on top of Trudy, who was still wearing her dress. Then he emptied a packet of oats over us and rubbed it into my long hair and Trudy’s shorter cut. Then something brown and sticky with lumps in it was dumped on the back of my head and Trudy’s face, mixing with the dried oats. I had no idea what it was, but Trudy identified it as “Ugh! Beef stew!” This was followed by tins of soup, peas and peaches in syrup. You can perhaps imagine the state of us. I wriggled until Dave slid off to the side of me and I pounced on him. Trudy got up and joined me in trying to strip Dave. We got his trousers down and pulled off his underpants, to expose an erect cock. Trudy poured a litre of milk over his chest including his shirt. I bent down and took his hard penis into my mouth, wanking him with my hand as I did so.

He lay back and enjoyed the experience. Trudy in the meantime, still in her messy dress, was ladling goo from the floor on to Dave’s face and head. She disappeared for a moment and came back with a load more packets and tins. The contents of which alternatively were either poured, tipped or rubbed into my arse, head of hair or Dave’s face. As I sucked at Dave’s penis I felt him tense up and I knew he was about to cum. I was right, I kept going and he ejaculated deep into my throat, three or four spurts of his lively semen filled my mouth and with an enormous gulp I swallowed the lot. I was close to climaxing myself and rolled off Dave to lie on my back and finger myself to conclusion. As I did this, I looked at Trudy and shifted my eyes to Dave’s prick and said to her “You want some?” Her jaw dropped then I said “Go one he’ll enjoy it!” Then I concentrated on bringing myself off. I noticed however Trudy had taken me up on my offer and was on her elbows and knees manipulating Dave’s now flaccid prick with her fingers and mouth. I don’t know why I had suggested it but the sight of my lovely friend sucking off my husband turned me on –and how!

I got up and crouched over her backside and brought myself off with the hem of her dress. I orgasmed and sank down behind her, cuddling her bum to me. She wiggled her backside into my chest and I found her breasts with my hands. I was caressing her bra-less tits through the soggy fabric of her dress, but suddenly that wasn’t enough. I put my hands to her neckline and pulled it apart, tearing the fabric, so I could fondle her pert little breasts with my bare, but messy hands. The moment I did this, she redoubled her efforts on Dave’s penis and succeeded in get it semi hard again. She stopped oral treatment and began a vigorous hand job on him and resulted in tiny amount of semen being produced. Satisfied with her work on the now exhausted Dave, she rolled over under me lying across Dave’s body. I lay on top of her and kissed her deeply as she fingered herself, her hand down the front of her panties. I pushed her hand away and brought her to orgasm myself pulling her panties down to her knees. I collapsed on top of her, my legs astride hers and we exchanged more kisses. We lay silent for a while, then she spoke. “If you ever want to do that to me again, just go ahead!” she murmured. “Which bit?” I asked. “Any or all of it, anytime – and I mean anytime, just do it, don’t ask!” She groaned slightly, “I‘ve so wanted to get involved with you, I believe that I would do anything you ask of me, and I mean anything.” I looked at her, “then kiss me.” I told her. She did -several times and I responded, if fact we sixty-nined and kissed sucked and licked at each other’s pussies until we both came again. Her panties discarded on the kitchen floor

Dave was delighted with this development so much so that he cleaned up the kitchen while Trudy and I bathed and showered together in an attempt to clean up ourselves, it took over an hour! When we got back downstairs, Dave had even washed Trudy’s dress. We put it in the tumble dryer and she insisted wearing it back home, even though the front was torn open. “What will you tell Joe?” I asked her. “The truth of course!” she retorted, “that you ripped it open in order to fondle my tits!” “Will he be jealous?” I asked. “He might be,” she responded, “but I shall tell him to feel free to do the same to you!” I laughed and said “Feel Free! I like that! Tell him I shall look forward to it!” “She likes it in public.” Dave added. “Oooh risky!” Trudy retorted “I will definitely tell him THAT! Why don’t you get your new friends Petra and Jan, to bring his sister, what she called? Sacha?” “Zophia” Dave corrected her. “Whatever,” Trudy continued, “on an experimental evening?” “Experimental?” I asked. “Yes,” Trudy explained “when you’re experimenting, you never know what will be revealed! Bye!” And with that she was gone.

[Squelch]

Great short story. Hot!