Me, Jane & the Mud

[Slapstickman]

A short story I posted elsewhere, but you may not have seen. I hope you enjoy it. Feedback, as always, is welcome.

I’ve had a bit of a crush on my new next door neighbour, Jane, since she moved in a couple of months ago. She’s pretty and tall with dark brown hair that flows just below her shoulders; slim, but quite curvy. We’d chatted a few times and she’s funny and bright.

I was driving home from work the other evening and I saw Jane in her front garden. It had been raining for hours and had only just stopped. Jane was leaning over a huge puddle of sloppy mud. She was wearing baggy sweatpants and a tight white vest top as she tried to scoop some water from the soaked mud in an attempt to dry out her garden.

Her sexy bum wiggled through her sweatpants as she bent over almost double. I honked my car horn as I drove up the drive; expecting Jane to turn and wave. The horn, however, seemed to give her a fright and she fell forwards, landing face down in the sloppy mud.

I stopped my car hurriedly and rushed over to the scene. Jane slowly peeled herself out of the mud. The front of her body was covered from her pretty face to her feet. She spluttered and swore as she pulled herself up. Her tight white vest top was sticking to her body and it was obvious she wasn’t wearing a bra, as her erect nipples and breasts were clearly visible through her sloppy and soaked top. She wiped her eyes free of mud and glared at me.

“I’m sorry” I gasped “I really didn’t mean to make you jump”

“You idiot” she yelled “look at me”. Jane scooped some mud out of her cleavage and flicked it onto the floor.

I was looking at her and she looked great, covered in mud; her messy clothes tight against her sexy body.

“I’ve never been so humiliated” she wailed; but before she’d finished speaking her humiliation was multiplied as her sweatpants, soaked and covered in thick mud, began to fall down. Jane was too slow to catch them and they ended up round her ankles, revealing a small white thong that barely provided any modesty.

“Oh my god!” she gasped. I leant forward to help her. But unfortunately I did so at exactly the same time she bent over to pull up her sweatpants. We clashed heads and she fell backwards into the muddy slop. The bottom of my trousers were splattered in mud as Jane landed, her sweatpants still round her ankles.

Jane flailed around in the sloppy mud, completely covered. “I don’t believe it” she gasped, the cold mud soaking through her thong and vest top.

“I’m sorry” I repeated, “It was an accident”

“You have a lot of accidents, don’t you?” she glared as I helped pull her slowly out of the mud. Sloppy brown goo was plastered over her nearly naked bum and dribbled down the back of her thighs. She ran her hands ruefully over her pert, slop-covered, buttocks.

Jane was dripping mud. Her face and hair were covered, her breasts almost ripping through her thin, once white, top. She was naked from the waist down except for what was probably the world’s smallest thong; the thong too was practically transparent, soaked as it was in thick wet mud. I could feel myself getting turned on at the sight of this gorgeous woman covered in goo.

“Is there anything I can do to help?” I asked, sheepishly.

“Yes” Jane replied “give me your belt”

“The belt from my trousers?” I asked

“Yes” she said

My work trousers were quite baggy, but after all the chaos I’d caused, I couldn’t really refuse Jane’s request. I slipped my belt off and handed it to her.

”Thank you” she said, tossing the belt into the middle of her garden as she walked behind me.

My confusion at her strange request didn’t last long as I felt my trousers being yanked down. With my trousers round my ankles, I lost my balance as she pushed me. I was sent; face first, into the sloppy mud.

“That’s cold…mmmppphhh” I spluttered as I landed in the mud with a splat, my white work shirt covered in the messy mud, my trousers still round my ankles.

I felt something tug at my boxers. Jane began to pull them down to my knees. I gasped as my upper thighs and my naked cock and balls made contact with the cold goo. My bare bottom stuck out from the mud. Jane leant over me and scooped up a handful of the gooiest mud she could find. She slapped it with force over my naked bum.

“I’m sorry” she giggled “what an accident”. She stepped out of her sweatpants and wiggled her sexy mud covered bum to her front door. Making sure I got a great view; she bent over as she opened her front door and went inside her house, leaving me face down and half naked in the sloppy mud in her garden.

[mr angry]

I like the sound of your neighbour!

I also come up with WAM related fantasies involving girls I sometimes come across during the course of the day, theres one at my branch of Nat West at the minute who has taken many an imaginary messing up! if only they knew!!

[sweetnpied]

OMG, I LOVE IT! I'm a little biased since I also love playing the hapless victim sometimes when I get messy, so that part of the story got me turned on. (I've actually done the... I'm reaching for something I accidentally dropped in the mess while dressed in a short skirt, getting myself too far extended, so my only recourse is to fall in face first... love the slapstick!!!) But your ending is PRICELESS, since I also love to eventually get even with hubby in the end. Shows the strength of a very short story. Quick and to the point (as opposed to my epics)! WONDERFUL!

[Slapstickman]

Thanks for your kind feedback sweetnpied. Is a major compliment coming from the author of the 'Christina' stories - which I love! I too often write epics but I wanted to see, in this case, if I could get the characters credibly messy (and at least partially naked) in a very short space of time. Am writing the second episode and hope to repeat the trick of keeping things brief, but still messy and naughty. we'll see........