The Splosh UK Forum

Sorry for being a bit ratty with one or two of you yesterday. I was having a bad one!

However my contrition isn't enough!

I've dressed up in my best rubber army outfit just for you so you can punish me how you want.

Massive mess, bondage, stinky stuff, hundreds of pies, spanking, smelly-breathed snogging, - you can do it to me! I deserve it for being such a sour-faced cow!

Come on, guys....do your worst, and post it here! Nothing barred... (probably)!

Hayley

gets a hose pipe conected to a giant custard vat and puts it up your skirt ( i hope you got knickers on sweetie)
Lets it rip,
mmmmmm what a great sight, seeing custard flowing up through that outfit and out the neck and sleeves.
pulls the hose back out and watches the custard dripping out of the hem

Takes a bucket of black treacle and pours it over your head then massages it well into your hair.

Aw, how can I be so mean to you when I can see your heart of gold shining out of the front of your chest!

Richard

sotonude wrote:...........when I can see your heart of gold shining out of the front of your chest!

makes a change from having the sun shine out of her arse

Right here goes time to be punished Miss Hayley,

Firstly a bad-breath snog when i have just got in from the pub after a "ahem" few pints and a big greasy kebab with extra chilli sauce my breath would really stink ,

Then i would bend you over pull up your skirt and cover your bum in syrup to get you ready for your spanking after your spanking you would be stripped to your undies and covered in a gooey flour and water mix and have 2 dozon 3 week old eggs broken over your head and a gallon of HP sauce poured over you at which point you would be handcuffed to the nearest radiator while i went to get a HAIR DRYER ,

With the hair dryer i would warm the flour and water mix until it was hard and then fuck off back to the pub for a couple of hours leaving you in a smelly heap handcuffed to the radiator to think about what you had done and when i got back i may release you if you where sorry enough.

wamram (really a nice bloke HONEST)

I figured it'd be more evil to deny Hayley the mess she craves. It'd be more evil to tie Hayley to a chair facing away from people having some particularly naughty messy fun.

piemeplease wrote:I figured it'd be more evil to deny Hayley the mess she craves. It'd be more evil to tie Hayley to a chair facing away from people having some particularly naughty messy fun.

Thats a good point never crossed my mind to do something like that.

wamram

In that outfit Hayley it would have to be a trip out on the moors for some messy manouveres, tie u to a tree to face the fireing squad lots of pies, custard and mud pies and a batalion of gunners armed with those machine guns from bugsy malone, and then a good hosing down with a treacle hose.

You would go to the pub where the soldiers and their tarty young girlfriends drank - looking beautiful in your outfit. They would put a dog collar and lead on you and a rubber pig's snout over your face and a litle pig's tail up your bum. You would then be led on all fours around the conveniently situated pigsty out the back of the pub. Your lovely face and hair would be pushed into a particularly rank thick area of muck.

Then you would be taken back into the pub and strapped to a chair with your mask and tail removed There would be a pub quiz, but your questions would be impossibly hard while everyone elses was easy - so you would, of course get them all wrong - and this would result in a penalty. The first the contents of a large overflowing ashtray tipped over your already filthy hair and rubbed in. Next some used engine oil supplied by friendly biker. Finally the pub landlady would donate a large pot of week old, rancid stew leftovers, which would be liberally applied to your hair and face. Then the soldiers and their girlfriends would .............?

Hope you like this, Hayley.
Starbrightnight x

I'd cheer you up by taking you out to the movies followed by a lovely Indian meal. And before bed I'd give you a lovely foot massage to relax you while you enjoy a nice box of chocolates and a glass of Bailey's. How's that?

Don't listen to Welshcakes, Haley. He's a big crawler.

You know I could give you the best time ever. And that would involved custard eggs treacle and feathers. Say no more!
I'm waiting by the phone for your call

Our victim will be happy to respond as soon as she's found her brain which she appears to have left in a bar somewhere last night - or rather early this morning.

BillShipton wrote:Our victim will be happy to respond as soon as she's found her brain which she appears to have left in a bar somewhere last night - or rather early this morning.

good night then?

piemeplease wrote:I figured it'd be more evil to deny Hayley the mess she craves. It'd be more evil to tie Hayley to a chair facing away from people having some particularly naughty messy fun.

That is just heartless and cruel, and I HATE you!! (sulk, wobbly bottom lip)

You are sooo gonna get pied when I meet you.

Hayley xxx

The custard hose up the skirt sounds wuunnnnnnderful, Laura! That would cure the hangover - especially WITHOUT THE KNICKERS! And a treacle hose sounds like a great invention. If only I could find one. Unfortunately I suspect like other Weapons of Mess Destruction, it doesn't exist.

Wamram, I never suspected you could be so horrid! Especially dried flour in the hair, think that would need shaving off! Got me all of a flutter thinking of you treating me as badly as that, especially the mess, spanking and kebab-flavoured kissing. Mmmmm!

The squaddie session sounded good too. Yes, a working over by uniformed soldiers and their slappers is DEFINITELY worth fingering, sorry, thinking about.

As for the meal, chocolates, Baileys and foot massage, Welshcakes, I am disgusted. Have you no idea how to treat a lady in this day and age?

Any more suggestions, I'm sure I need punishing more than that!

Hayley
(no longer hungover or being horrible)