The Splosh UK Forum

Long time lurker and age old admirer of Hayley & Bill. Run risk of appearing rude, but if I covered off all that I would like to say regards the difference they make we would be into a valid, but pretty long and boring thread - at least six paragraphs. Ditto covering my background - at least three paragraphs worth!
So hope no offence taken.

My messy fetish is definitely inclined toward the feminine side. Unfortunately as a hairy, chunky bloke my dress-up efforts range from unconvincing to .... worse!

For some reason I am blessed with an incredible partner - she knows fully of my fetish, but - until recently- couldnt really get the gist of it. That changed very suddenly - we were watching a St Trinians film. She mentioned in passing what a fantasy of hers it was - this meandered on to saying that she particularly relished the thought of being a rebellious schoolgirl throwing flour bombs at the mistresses and frumpy schoolgirls. Our thoughts matched with an audible click!!!

In that instant she found a way to relate her outlook to mine and in the literal flash was only too keen to put into action - god really does exist!

A bit of planning has provided a free week together in August. We are chatting through various scenarios - but bottom line is that for at least two days she will be a naughty school girl and I will be dressed as - switches between school mistress and frumpy schoolgirl.

We are lucky to have access to a fairly remote house with large barn, adjacent forest and a pretty icky peat bog - complete with pond. Additionally - WAM fetish differences werent a big issue between us due to er... other interests. Suffice to say access to full stocks & pillory, miriad ropes, chains etc wont be a problem

Once aroused my fetish runs very close to Hayleys ( at least to what shes admitted so far - we do want more! ). Many ideas of our own flying about and I am happy to take the lot - so far in line for flour and egging, water bombs, ink ( she really is now into this ), soot, wall paper paste and saw dust - the list goes on. I think safe to assume I have an appointment with the peat bog and a dunking in the slimiest part of the pond - she is a nasty piece of work, glad I wasnt at school with her! One of her initial ideas - must admit threw me greatly at first, but really has grown on me - is that my hair is going to be dyed - likely bright red. Permanent or temporary is her choice and hugely erotic to feel she might go either way. Even I'm starting to feel a bit wierd now.

So why write this? I am not trying for a 'ha ha look at me' - I respect Bill and Hayley too much for that.

I hope that strange way this came together for me helps others who are trying to resolve things with their partners.

After that, I would like to give away some of the control - submissive like Hayley I suppose. Unlikely there will be pictures, but I promise to write up what happens - with your permission. But I would be grateful for any suggestions/ ideas. It is a turn on to think of others contemplating my fate and suggesting yucky things to happen to me. My good lady may get a bit messy, but her dream is to dish it out - fine with me!

So any ideas - preferably horrid enough to make Hayley blush - that fit with bad School girl gets even with snotty school mistress or timid schoolgirl?

Of course ' you wouldnt dare'....

Pleased you didn't do the five paragraphs of grovelling. The story is much better! Please tell us more of what you get up to, and feel free to try and make me blush - you'll have a job, but go for it!!

Hayley x

This sounds so contrived!

Better half - Jane - was reading my post. Was a bit uncertain about sending, so thought it through etc. together.

Seeing it posted up put us both a bit 'tingly' - we really dont get out much.

Light until late here - quite far North. But it has been a hot day. Heat remains but has started to rain in heavy showers. Likely to be a hot night.

Whilst pouring ink over me - Janes idea, coating me in paste ( mine )- adding Saw dust ( hers ) - the cow! Was fine by her, she was worried about the dirt aspect of the peat bog. I have shown her postings from elsewhere and even dug out an old geography/ biology book - explaining how acid the peat is - hence ancient bodies etc.

With tingling in progress, Jane has just suggested that might be an idea to try a test bogging first. Obviously I was hugely reluctant , but obedience is a virtue.

Was intending to settle to the TV until goes dark.

Down the track forest harvesters were in last summer. At one point they got bogged down and left deep churned ruts where their chained wheels span. The ruts are about 2 feet wide and run upto 4 feet deep. They are filled with peaty water - running from just dark water to a thick slurry mix. With the summer they are topped with yellow pollen and slight green slime. The ruts run for about one hundred yards. Just had to admit to Jane I'd been looking at them the other day!

Jane has made me type this reply out and has just come back in. She is going to dress me in some full white knickers, white opaque tights, bra, a cream shift type dress and some ankle strap ( to keep them on in the mud! ) heels. Oh - she says I am also going to get full make up.

Apparently once dressed I am going to be taken into the woods - once shes checked no one about and sat by a tree out of sight. Shes going to tie me to the tree then leave me in the rain for a few hours whilst she watches a dvd.

About 11 it should be dark enough and she'll make me walk the 500 metres to the ruts. Not decided what she is going to do - but pushing me in face first seems to appeal!

Apparently my knickers await and I have to go now.

Have a nice time at the tree...and beware of people walking their dogs!

DELETED

Sounds fantastic Tapp, ket us all know how it goes on both scenes.

Ideas for St Trinians Scene, try some old fashion lousy school food: Pink blancmange, tapioca pudding, LUMPY custard and LUMPY gravy, how about some extremely mushy weetabix, and obviously lots of nasty porridge.

Good luck and happy messing
Gooeykez

I'm sitting in the woods watching

Mercedes x

Yes, we wanna know how it went!

Hayley

(tie me to a tree and do your worst!)

Sorry for the delay - and thank you responses to date - very flattered.

Luckily - or unluckily, we are pretty remote, so very few unexpected visitors; though Murphys law etc!

Rapidly realised one reason for this, MIDGES! Having had very little experience of thin tights ( opaques got changed to fine denier ) in the woods at high midge season until friday night, I can now confirm they offer zero protection.

I was dressed as promised and led out into the trees. Despite having closet dressed for years, its been around the house or quick amble in garden. I love the feel of heels and walking in them a reasonable distance was bliss. However, not designed for 'off-roading'. Anticipated sinking heels, but hadnt considered just how many sharp pine needles and small vicious twigs there are when tootsies only clad in 'dainty' shoes and tights. That said, my discomfort seemed to turn J on greatly and that made me tingle too.

With some experience of being tied we went for fairly loose bonds - secure loops around wrists and plenty of play so arms didnt get stressed.

Having read through the forum, J quite buzzing with ideas. I was left for about an hour in light drizzle then she came back to see how I was - and not least gloat. Whilst wanting to be gleefully 'got', this fetish ( for me at least ) needs to follow who we are. In 'real life' my partner is my soul mate, I need to see her happy. Indulging my fetish aside, I was delighted to see how much she was actually enjoying this. Its early days, but reading here has helped J undestand how my mind kinda works. She isnt looking at it as being truly nasty to me anymore.... gulp!

I was fairly uncomfortable by that stage - with static position, strange clothing, drizzle soaked and those midges. My heart ponded as she said I looked far to settled for my own good. The next bit I suspect I can blame Hayley for - not strictly gross, but pretty yucky. J had brought a tub - the drain off from a roast chicken two days earlier. It was congealed chicken fat, juices and assorted gooey bits. She held it in front of me so I could see. She then set about shampooing it into my hair, over my face and took particular care to push it in my ears - yuck. The smell and feel was incredible, all the more compounded by having no choice - I was in heaven.

Not a further word was said, she just walked off.

She returned about 12. Untied me and pushed me toward the track - more stabbed feet!

She stopped me on the track and spent about twenty minutes making me walk up and down - until it was lady like enough. Then made me walk to the ruts.

Even through the chicken guck facial I could smell the stagnant peat slurry. I stopped at the edge only to be pushed forwards. She told me to slowly walk in. The edge was sticky mud, quickly edging to a liquid slurry about two feet deep with soft clingling mud of about 6 inches on the bottom and a drier scummy layer about 2 inches on top.

I found a section that came to the top of my thighs - soaking the bottom of the dress. J had me stop, move to the side and face her. I had to lift my dress, tucking it in my bra. She had me pull my tights and knickers down to mid thigh. The moon was strong enough to see ok. She took a handful of green slimey scum and 'washed' my genitals thoroughly. Taking more scoops she worked it between my legs and into my bottom. This brutality was accompanied with lots of gleeful giggles.

Finally she gathered and double handful of slime and vegetation and dumped it into the gusset of my knickers. My fingers were too cold/ slick by this stage, so she reached and roughly pulled up my panties & tights. Untucked my dress and smoothed it down.

I was told to kneel in the slurry. The feel as the filthy peat water saturated my bra was incredible. I got about three seconds to enjoy as she grabbed my hair and forcefully - but slowly- tipped my head forward dunked me right under. Breath play is one of J's interests - I dont like it much at all. Sounds maybe strange, but it felt wonderful that she did then held me under - probably for all of 7 seconds, but enough. I loved her for that. To my outlook she showed me she loved me enough to do what I wanted - to take control, to use me as she wished - that make any sense?
Must point out that we know each other and trust is total and I mean total.
She brought me up, laughed - but did check I was ok - then I got the same again - repeated about two dozen times.

I was then pulled to the side and climbed out - unexpectedly hard in a plastered dress. I was walked home - again stopping to be forced to walk like a girl - in so far as a lump like me can. That 500 metres was exhausting - the dress sagged with the weight of the peat mud and clung to my legs.

At the house a pallet had been set on end and I was stood against it. Cable ties held my wrists to the frame and J got out the washer - which thankfully has a warm setting. I got a very soapy hosing for about twenty minutes. Then released, stripped and another hosing.

Finally went for a long, long shower and got to bed early Saturday morning.

Saturday J made me dress as a man - boo! But did make me hand wash my clothes from the last night - tights and knickers were scrapped. The bra and dress took ages. I dont care what Persil say, peaty brown is the new shade of white!

The shoes survived and are still drying.

The tingle between us is still there. Had house chores to do this weekend - mainly tidying out the barn. Taking ages as we constantly stop and just cuddle/ hug. I think/ worry too much about everything. Repeated that she needed to be happy with this - I need her more than anything else.

Think got answer when I turned round yesterday afternoon to see J approach with a tub and an evil smile. My heart pounding I stood placidly. No words, no preamble she slowly tipped the tub over me - contained dirty sawdust and unidentifiable 'bits'. She pulled out the neck of my tee shirt and made sure lots went down back and front.

J then rubbed the sawdust thoroughly into my hair. Then made me carry on tidying up - it was four hours before I got cleaned up.

We have continued to bat ideas about for August. My hair is going to be left to grow longish. Seems I am definitely in for a permanent hair dye - but I can get away with a number one cut for going back to work and my hair grows very fast. Anyone got either the Express or Mail on Saturday - theres an ad for hair dye with Davina Mc - likely thats the colour I'm getting -

In terms of scenes/ mess, J quite interested in seeing what comes up on the forum. I particularly liked the lumpy gravy/ semolina suggestion and mushed up shreddies are incredibly yucky - thank you!

Toward the 'outer limits', J thinks I should be made to wet myself whikst dressed and tied. In addition, an incident from her childhood - where she sat in a cowpat ( by accident ) in a short skirt and cotton gym knickers and was made to ride home in the car dressed in the gooey clothes and sat on a plastic bag for two hours has given some fairly broadminded ideas for horrid schoolgirls to punish hostage school mistresses.

Sorry for ramble, things have kind of snowballed these last few days. New for J and very much realisation of a lifetime of dreams for me - so bubbling over a bit.

Think people here will perhaps understand more than most, though may seem strange. Something apparently so perverse is actually very much secondary to love and closeness. Hope this thread helps others either with uncertain partners or at least feel less isolated or unusual.

Please do let us have any further ideas. J is thinking that maybe could take none- compromising photo or two in time just to prove not a lonely Lenny ( her term ) and to say thank you.

DELETED

Fantastic account Tapp, sounds like you had a real good time and so it would seem did your partner, i cant wait to hear about the St Trinians scene, if it is half as good as the peat bog it will be perfect.
Gooeykez

Updates may get sporadic - this work/ earning stuff really does interfere with my life!

Thank you for all interest thus far.

Will take care regards certain items and risk of something more damaging/ permanent than coloured hair!

Feel bit embarrassed asking - kinda things everyone is supposed to know. However, once read a book 'Everything a girl should know' or some such, in the foreword the author explained she was prompted to write having endured years of hating baths. She was well into her twenties before realised you didnt have to sit at the end where the taps are...

Embarrassing because its to do with cleaning and guess feel these things are supposed to be known. Think you will have gathered that my ears seem a target for J. Well despite thorough soak in bath, gentle soaping and rinses with shower, I 'm still dropping bits of peat out of my ears!
I have a large syringe ( dont ask ) and pondered gentle wash out with tepid water.

What do you pro's do?

Many thanks.

Sounds like an amazing night. Thanks for telling us about it. The next stage is getting your missus to take some pics of you in your humiliated state (not that I can moan about that!).

I echo all the talk about e-coli. You can buy sacks of rotted horse manure that I have used a lot and it seems fine. It is still wet but smells more earthy than shitty. Cow shit has all kinds of nasties in it.

Hayley

I noted commentary regards the poohey side of things on some of the other threads.

Just tried to look up an previous Splosh mag where you ( Hayley ) put it quite well about getting to a certain stage where you dont care/ want the lot. But still got it across within context of the age old bondage play adage - SSC = safe, sane, consensual.

Want to be well and truly got - but implicit trust is that nothing truly damaging or nasty or permanently changing involved.

Murphys law seems to stalk me, so am cautious to a fault. Some of my - non pervy at that - activities up here involve crawling through peat bogs; noting the grouse/ black game poo floating past, removing various animal internal organs with bare hands ( keeps them warm on cold days ) and assorted other quaint Northern activities. All so far without incident. Would be just my luck to contract galloping bottom rot from a cup full of cow doo-doo! So humour aside, I do take the cautions seriously and gratefully.


The dried manure sounds interesting - havent noticed it, but then not been looking before! Though I am a freakily unconvincing cross dresser at the best of times - the jodphurs that manure suggests would do my 'credibility' no favours!

Work ( yawn ) going to have to get attention over next week or so, but I will keep you posted of any developments. Thank you again for the kind interest and suggestions thus far.

I know you mercilessly put down compliments. But thank you Hayley and Bill for all that you do. It is appreciated. I know - spend some money!

Wow, what an adventure; envy, envy!!

Can't say the bondage side of things does much for me but, as a confirmed crossdresser, the thought of being forced to walk up muddy tracks in heels, tights and a pretty dress and then to be dunked in deep mud is too too much!

Having broken the ice, I'm sure the two of you will come up with loads of other messy ideas; don't forget to share them with us.