The WAM news (idea)

[Phantom]

Hi

I've just been checking out the preview movie at Naked News

http://www.nakednews.com/

For those who've never heard of it, Naked News is like a regular news show, except the hot, smartly-dressed presenters strip off while they deliver the headlines.

You can see where I'm going with this, right? How COOL would it be if there was a WAM news site? The girls get more and more mess thrown on them and dumped on them from off camera as they keep a straight face and read the news.

Or two co-presenters sit side by side messing each other up. Each takes it turn to sling the food while the other reads a bulletin.

I know, I know - quite a few sites have already done messy news and weather sketches .... most notably right here at Splosh.co.uk, which has done some hilarious ones.

...but I'm thinking how about an entire website devoted to it! I've always loved seeing smart office attire in a messy scene, and to see regualr updates of messy newsreaders and weather girls would be amazing.

Naked News isn't a comedy thing - it's exactly like a regualr news channel, but with sexy girls stripping to their underwear, then naked. What a fantastic concept!!

If any wouldbe WAM producers out there are thinking of launching their own website, why not give this idea a try? In a sea of WAM sites, yours would stand out as offering something unique.

Phantom


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[Sidi]

This wam idea was done in the excellent video WsmTV.

[Phantom]

Read my post again - I already said it's been done before as one-off sketches.

I'm thinking of a site that updates weekly and is dedicated to messy news, weather, sports and entertainment items. And possibly a roving reporter who gets messed out of doors.

[Etonman]

Sounds good to me...I've always enjoyed the few news/weather skits that I've seen in the past.
Newsreaders and weathergirls in smart skirt-suits or trouser-suits, with immaculate hairdos and makeup. And the messing done fairly slowly, so that they could still manage to read the scripts uninterupted and with a serious expression...some of the mess might even relate to the news item if appropriate...e.g. water shower when the forecast was rain, black "oil" for financial news of oil prices, or flour for grain prices.
Any other ideas, anyone?

[Phantom]

Hi Etonman

I also love the news skits where the mess matches the news item, but I'm not sure that would work for a dedicated WAM news site.

The thing I love about Naked News is that apart from the nakedness, it's a really high budget, professional news service.

I imagined the WAM news being the same - they deliver news bulletins, seemingly unphased by the fact that someone is slowly messing them up, stripping them off, filling their underwear.

If you use real news items, it becomes difficult to tie mess into each one. It's not everyday that a lorry carrying custard overturns on the M1 !

But - you could have different mess types for different slots. For example:

The wetlook weather
Sport 'n' pies
Miscillaneous food for the main news
buckets and business report
eggy entertainment update

I don't know ... the fact is, it's only a pipe dream really - the average WAM producer just doesn't have the cash or studio facilities to do something on the scale of Naked News on a regular enough basis to make it current.

But it's nice to dream about it, and in the meantime there are the existing WAM sketches to enjoy (I've got a few of them on video)

Phantom

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[andy250]

I love these type sketches Bill did some really funny ones in messy missies, though it has been done before, so trying to re-invent is the challenge also having the comedy element in it as well as the messy.

regards

Andy

[Phantom]

Hi Andy

I do enjoy Bill's comedy news sketches. But again - that wasn't really what I had in mind when imagining the WAM News site. I think it would work best done straight.

In the Naked News, there are no corny gags - it's not like Benny Hill (ooh, missus, my clothes have all fallen off). It's just a news show that happens to have sexy women undressing while they present.

I thought that concept would work just as well for WAM News ... so it would be sexy and erotic rather than aiming for laughs. I think the comedy news and weather sketches work well as one-off funny shorts (and so did the brilliant 'It's Splatterday' with Jo and Emma) ... but the hook for WAM news would be the fact that the girls don't even react to the mess - they stay totally professional and deliver the bulletins no matter what happens to them ... always ending up stripped and covered.

Still ... since this is only daydream stuff, feel free to picture it working in whichever way would be most entertaining for you. That's just how I would 'reinvent' the concept ... rather than try to copy or improve on the Splosh and WSM comedy scenes - just play it straight.

Phantom


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[BillShipton]

The comedy sketches work well because they are exactly that.

News - as well as being big budget - tends to be rather serious in the main (Iraq, missing kids, kidnapped security me etc) which frankly doesn't lend itself to any sort of sexual treatment. Naked News works because you almost forget the nudity as the presenters make no reference to it. Since you have to actively keep doing something with messy stuff (adding to the mess, pieing etc) which is often associated with slapstick humour I think it would just come over as extremely inappropriate if done for real rather than as comedy.

If you just do lighter stories like entertainment, weather, sport etc then it isn't a real news service which is what Phantom seems to want.

I like the idea of wetlook weather though. A girl doing a daily weather forecast being soaked as she does it (no jokes) and a genuine forecast would be fun. Hard work for a daily update which basically only has one idea, but a nice novelty.

[Phantom]

Hi Bill

I agree about the clash of sexual content and reports on Iraq. I've often wondered that about Naked News (not having subscribed to it) ... I mean, do they strip off whilst reporting a teenager going into a school and gunning down several dozen classmates?

To be honest, I wouldn't really care what the content of the show was. It needn't be news at all. It could be some sort of chat show or entertainment show or sports broadcast ... for me, the thing that appeals is the idea of smartly dressed women, doing their best to be professional whilst getting progressively messier/undressed.

I do like the light-hearted skits in WAM, but I can honestly say no WAM video I've ever seen has made me laugh ... or even chuckle. The puns and gags are usually groan-worthy, and the models aren't professional comedians or actresses, so the timing and delivery is usually flat or overdone.

Emma and Ophelia have come the closest to doing it well - both were very natural ... in fact I think Emma would do really well in television. I think groan-making comedy is still enjoyable to watch as the girls get messy, but I never watch a WAM video for it's comedy value.

Anyway - it all makes for interesting discussion.

Phantom

[Hayley]

I disagree.

Sploshing videos often makes me laugh. The gags are deliberately corny, the facial expressions deliberately over-the-top and the more recent films are better timed comedy-wise thanks to more editing. That is funny in my opinion. Of course, the girls aren't comedy actresses (though some are close) but that adds to the humour. However I seem to remember from previous posts that we don't share the same sense of humour, so I won't go on.

[Phantom]

Bill

I should add that whilst I've never found WAM videos hilarious, I don't think I could do any better myself. Some WAM scenes I find mildly amusing, but they never crack me up. Just turn me on!

As a little kid I found it funny when snobby people got a pie in a Laurel and Hardy film or someone fell into a bath of whitewash or something ... but as I grew older, those things ceased to make me laugh, and I started realising I got turned on by them - that was the only attraction for me then.

Phantom

[BillShipton]

It was Hayley not me who said they make her laugh.

Watching it later, I never find my own stuff funny (or even much of a turn-on) cos I know all the compromises I made to get it done, so I just spot all the mistakes of which there are many.

For me Slapstick in general can be quite funny as well as a turn-on. As for sploshing videos, some of characterisations and ludicrous ideas performed by Gill and co at the Silly House have actually made me laugh whilst filming them (including Gilly trying to get out of the water-filled tub in Unstable Girl, Dolly's Good Ship Lollipop routine and Porn Lake. That has nothing to do with my abilities, just the way the girls performed them on the day.

[andy250]

I disagree.

Sploshing videos often makes me laugh. The gags are deliberately corny, the facial expressions deliberately over-the-top and the more recent films are better timed comedy-wise thanks to more editing. That is funny in my opinion. Of course, the girls aren't comedy actresses (though some are close) but that adds to the humour. However I seem to remember from previous posts that we don't share the same sense of humour, so I won't go on.

On this I have to agree with Hayley, I do like the funny side to it as well as the sexual element I can sometimes watch some of the scene's and just giggle my head off. Old Macdonlds farm is one of these.

Though I also have to say I have found that when doing your own films or working for somebody else you are deffo very critical of what you do. I always walk away thinking, next time I'll try a diffrent angle. I also find more and more I like talking to the camera.

regards

Andy

[Phantom]

Andy

Being critical of your own work should be seen as a strength - so long as you're not too hard on yourself!

It means you don't get complacent and just churn out the same old formula time and time again. Helps to keep things fresh.

Phantom

[TottyMcGee]

We tend to organise our sessions more as games than scripted skits - though we might write the odd gag or scene in advance it's as a springboard to help everyone get into the spirit of the thing and keep things moving, rather than to carefully plan out a perfectly executed piece of comedy. This means that when I come to edit the video it's mostly a matter of figuring out how best to present whatever came up during the session, which may be completely different to the idea we had going in. I do wonder if the bits in our films that make us laugh are of the "had to be there" variety (I don't know, seeing as how I was there), but it's fun doing it and I can enjoy watching it back too.

Mind you, even as a non-WAM performer I've always been better working from improvisation than from faithfully following a script. I lack the discipline and acting skills to make something scripted seem natural, but most of my best stuff over the years has come from something that I improvised on-stage, got a good reaction from and so went home and wrote it properly.